Archive for May, 2011

Making Transitions

Wednesday, May 25th, 2011

Last week we talked with a reporter who was writing a story about women facing life changes. Her questions were prompted by Maria Shriver’s situation and her YouTube video asking for advice on making life transitions.

The question got us thinking about our top three steps in making transitions that are real and lasting:

1. Spend time alone. Our society encourages us to look for answers outside ourselves. As a result, we’re easily distracted from real change, thinking that a move to a new home, job or relationship will fix our problems. Or that we can busy ourselves enough to forget about pain or grief. In truth, real and lasting transition begins inside. And the only way to access it is to remove ourselves for a time from the noise of the outer world.

2. Ask yourself important questions. Here are a few Tending Your Inner Garden favorites:

What do you want more of in your life?

What would you like to let go of?

If you had more time for yourself, what would you do?

Think of a time when you felt happy or successful. Why did you feel that way?

What roles do you play? Do they reflect who you really are or want to be?

What’s out of control in your life?

What are you most afraid of?

What do you need in order to grow?

What are you grateful for?

How could you nurture yourself more?

3. Treat yourself like your best friend.
When you do that, you’ll always be in good company. Without it, you’ll be lonely no matter where you are, what you’re doing or who’s in the room. To achieve that kind of relationship with yourself, start by journaling about the questions above, then commit to doing one small thing differently each day to honor and acknowledge your own value and uniqueness.

Want to read the entire newspaper article? Click here.

Theme for May: Open Up to New Possibilities

Friday, May 6th, 2011

What happens if you stand in front of a mirror, look yourself in the eye and say, “I love you”?

Do you squirm, look away, or feel self-indulgent or silly? Or do you experience a sense of peace, a feeling that you deserve the same care and compassion you give to others?

Claiming self-love can be a challenge in a world that teaches us 1,000 ways to criticize and analyze ourselves daily. (“Uh-oh…where did that cellulite come from?!”)

Opening yourself to possibilities, though, has everything to do with loving yourself, cellulite and all. Nothing shuts the door in the face of creation faster than un-self-loving beliefs like, “I’m not good enough. I don’t deserve to be happy. I never do anything right.”

What are your beliefs about loving yourself? Journal about any or all of the following statements that resonate for you in some way.

• I need to be perfect to be lovable.

• I can forgive myself for being imperfect.

• Saying “I love myself” sounds conceited or self-absorbed.

• I am who I am for a reason, and I celebrate getting to know the real me.

What insights emerge from your journaling? In what ways do your beliefs limit or support you in creating your heart’s desire?